Journey to the Blood Stained Home

Rune shook his head in disbelief "not even one?" he questioned as he moved closer before sitting down. "Pallatsera was friends with many and she was someone the members valued very dearly. She always seemed to have the backs of any who needed it and her wisdom was always appreciated. In many ways she was different then most wolves I've ever met before in my life.”

“The most recent death was Karma's and no she was plenty liked even if she didn't fully realize it. She was a good friend and could never be replaced by any other. I believe I would say the two were equal when it came to friends within the pack. Either way they were both valued members and neither of them could ever be replaced by any other." Rune stated just before a puzzling look appeared upon his face. Charna had just mentioned Pallatsera a wolf from the past. Although, he found it interesting that she knew of such a wolf the time to ask was not now.

With the shift of his feet he forced himself back on the subject of friendship as he caught her question about what a friend was exactly. "Well, a friend is someone that accepts you for you and who includes all your defaults, its someone you trust without a second of hesitation, it’s also one of the nicest things you can have, and one of the best things you can be." Rune replied as he offered the same warm smile to the female she had recently offered him.

"You are indeed apart of this pack now which means you will find a friend within someone. Some friendships may come easier then others and then again some maybe extremely hard to gain, but if you continue to try and you take advantage of this advice I am giving you. I doubt you will be forgotten when it is your time to depart from this place."

Charna listened silently. He had seemed puzzled, but gave a reasonable answer. She nodded, it made sense. "Thank you for that," her tail swung behind her slowly as she looked around in awe. This forest was really big and the trees were everywhere! She focused back on the male, "so, you're the alpha?"

Falco sat in a dream world, pretty much as usual, he looked around and flicked his ash tinted ears. Lifting his head he got to his paws stumbling a little, feeling the effects of sleep drunkenness. He scented the air and headed off to the scent of his mate and her friend Mahina, Falco hadn't known much about Mahina but was willing to find out. Smiling as he approached the two he saw Silver wasn't feeling well. It seemed that Mahina had just spoke and he continued to approach and nudged Silver ever so gently under her chin "I know your having trouble with memories out here Silver, Please share them with me, It may make it a lot easier.... How are your wounds?" he changed the subject not wanting to seem too over worry about her past. The white male sat beside Mahina and he gave her a slight smile landlocked back to silver with his green eyes.

(sorry I haven't posted I have been busy the past few days!)

"Ah, yes that would be me or at least I am told such things." Rune replied as he let out a soft chuckle and diverted his gaze elsewhere. "I'm not sure how much time has passed since your acceptance, but how are you liking things here?" Rune inquired as he let a small tiresome yawn escape through his muzzle.

(Sorry, it is awful but I can't seem to think of anything else right now. XD)

Charna nodded to the male. "Yes quite," she responded. Another smile creased her muzzle as he yawned. Things were rather exciting here, so she assumed that they got good rest when they slept. Stepping back, Charna dipped her head, "you seem tired, so I guess I'll go find some friends.

(Lame!)

Elysia looked to Derek. She had expected, hoped at least, that he would speak. She wanted to hear everything - every detail. Every movement Pallatsera had made, maybe the echoes of her laughter and her love. Instead he was quiet, awkward, brooding. She wanted to understand, to be able to look past that but she couldn't. The words he said weren't connecting in her mind. Pallatsera's mate. Pallatsera had a mate. Pallatsera had this mate. And now Pallatsera had no one, and no one had Pallatsera.

"What is your name?"

Finally, he had spoken. Elysia met his gaze, keeping her amber eyes tranquil despite her turmoil. She dipped her head respectfully to him, her voice quiet and calm. "Elysia, my name is Elysia." She paused a moment. Normally, this would be the time when the other would reply with their name. Something about this male was off though, it might be safe to be painfully clear on everything. She perked her ears. "And you?" Her heart was beginning to ache. She began to wonder which of the two of them had ever really known Pallatsera, and what they had lost.

She found herself gazing at the male before her. He didnt seem like Pallatsera's type, then again Elysia hadn't even known Pallatsera had a type. The male she had loved, this must be a shell of him. This brooding, dark, silent male - he was not who Pallatsera would have loved. Elysia yearned to say it, to deny him relation to her. But she saw the greif, so fresh and so pure and she couldn't. She was simply silent, gazing at a wolf who seemed impossible to love - but had earned the devotion of her beloved sister.

Elysia

That is what she called herself, it seemed easier now, knowing her name. "My name is Derek" He stood there for a few more moments gathering his thoughts, he knew the female wished to know of his sister, and probably was wondering how she could ever have loved him. He stopped on that thought and let the pain sink in. How many times had he wondered the same thing?

He shook his head, it was time to deal with the present, not the past. "I suppose you wish to know about Sera, but you must understand, what you ask is not easy, and though you are a stranger i will be frank with you. I had never known true love before i met your sister, and that when she died I was never the same, if it had not been for this pack i would not have survived. That what you ask comes at a great price for me, but because you were her sister, and she would have wanted me to tell you i will begin her story when you are ready." He spoke nearly shaking with the memories.

Derek. Such a flat and...normal name. Pallatsera, Elysia had always imagined her sister mating some majestic powerful proud male with an exotic name and having litters of beautiful little silver pups. But there was just Derek. Derek who had apparently loved her, lost her and been broken by her. Derek who was struggling to survive in the wake of loss. Derek who was willing, despite it all, to share his loss with her. Elysia took a breath. She was wrong. He was strong, stronger than she would have been able to be if it was him asking her to reopen the wounds. Elysia regretted her thoughts, her patronizing manner. She dipped her head, struggling to control her emotions.

"I know," She paused, calming herself and drawing on the inner tranquility she had learned from Pallatsera. "I know what I ask is not something you would wish to bestow upon a stranger." She felt to urge to move closer to him, to share his grief physically as well as emotionally. Her eyes fluttered closed, then open once more. "I..I dont know if what I offer would be enough for you but," She hesitated. Was she opening herself too wide? What was she offereing him? What could she ever give him? "I knew her, a different her than you knew. If you, if you wanted to know my sister as well as you knew your mate," she raised her gaze to him. "It is something I would be willing to give to you."

The Pallatsera he had known was the she-wolf that loved him with all his heart. But had he known the older sister? No. Just the mate. The alpha. Not the daughter, the sister, the teacher. Elysia could give that to him. She, she almost wanted to give it to him. The grief she felt, the true overwhelming grief and loss, it hadn't hit yet. She was still in shock - still able to speak and give and think. Though she knew that as Derek's story came out, so would her grief. And with that realization came another. She was alone, and there would be no one to console her in her grief. No pack as Derek had had. Elysia - by her own doing and the doings of fate - was alone.

Derek just nodded his head. What else could he do, he was already opening himself to the past and with that the pain. He had locked most of it away, so that he could be a better delta, and with time a better beta, but it had never truly gone away.

"To tell the story of Palla and the pack, i guess you need to start at where i first met her." He sat knowing his legs would not hold him as he told this story. He gestured to Elysia to do the same. The burden he would speak of would take it's toll on both of them.

Elysia looked to Derek, wondering how close she should be. What was appropriate? Would he attack her? Well no, he wasn't going to attack her. But still. She laid down, close but not close enough to feel his fur brush hers. She rested her head on her paws, looking to him with her steady amber gaze. She knew the story would be long - not only because of all there was to tell but the emotional difficulty as well. She braced herself, promising to stay strong though she wondered if it was a promise she could ever keep.

Elysia was tempted to speak, but knew it was not her place to interrupt. She would allow Derek to tell his story without the distraction of her voice - however difficult that may be. In a way, she felt like Pallatsera wasnt really dead until Elysia knew everything. Right now, she was only dead as claimed. It could still be untrue. Perhaps a different Pallatsera? No, it wasn't possible. Elysia withheld a sigh and looked to Derek.

She was struck suddenly with admiration for the male. He had loved, and lost and was speaking. She had just loved but she knew if she lost - she wouldn't speak. She would hide and bottle and hold her head high as if everything was fine. She would mask herself in tranquility, all the while looking for someone to share her grief and make her better again. Elysia wondered agian whose shoulder she would lean on when it was all said and done.

(This story will be told as a flashback!!!! notice i don't remember everything so it may be a little different then it was before.)

Derek's eyes slide shut as the memories came. The first day...



Derek shook his head eyes still shut as he came out of the first part of his telling. "We were so young then, all of us, age and the horrors of age meant nothing to us. We felt invincible and strong. the pack was growing every day and we had no reason to worry about the future. Though maybe it would have been best if we had."

Elysia couldnt help her mouth from falling open. Pallatsera - Derek's Pallatsera - she sounded so young and innocent. She sounded so hopeful. She sounded...like Elysia. This version of her sister, she wasn't just Elysia's anymore. She, was Derek's too. He had her and Elysia wasnt sure how that made her feel. Elysia felt lost, alone, and for some reason violated. She kept her lips sealed with difficulty, waiting until he had finished for the moment. Very quietly, she shook her head in response to his final words.

"No, innocence is a virture best protected." Elysia said no more. Simply reassuring Derek. She didnt know why she did, she didnt know him. But he knew her - or someone she had loved and that was as good as. She pressed her side to Derek's quickly - the smallest of actions. A comfort and encouragement. She meant nothing by it, nothing inappropriate towards a wolf she knew nothing of. She withdrew just as quickly, waiting for Derek to continue on his own time.

Elysia rested her head on her paws, much in the way Pallatsera used to when she felt pensive. She looked to Derek, feeling a growing respect as he did something she knew she couldn't. How could Pallatsera have been so different? She sounded so innocent, so fresh and hopeful. She listened enraptured for Derek to continue.

Derek did continue "Well time went by and your sister and myself became the best of friends, so close was our friendship that we spent most of our time together. I guess that is when everything really started going downhill...


We lost many that night but none so horrible as our alpha female Nadia. It toke a toll on the pack and to everyone's surprise instead of leaving her beta Dakota in charge, Nadia had made Palla the new alpha. Things seemed to change so quickly, it was then i decided what i wanted from my life, and that was your sister...


"She rejected me, to afraid of her past to see he future i guess. I spent days not looking at her the pack around us trying to make us both happy. We both knew the truth but your sister didn't want that, not again. So after what seemed like years i got the courage to ask once more, afraid of what would be said, and to my everlasting surprise, she said yes. I finally had what i had been dreaming of." He wished he could stop there, on that happy note, but there was so much more, more happiness and then the day it all changed.

Elysia listened enraptured. She smiled, imagining her sister and Derek - much younger than now. She could see Pallatsera, simply sitting quietly like she so often loved to do. Then there was Derek - a young happy in love Derek. Elysia honestly couldn't picture it. How he would have laid his head against her back, loving her and afraid to tell. And then Pallatsera...refusing? Why? Her past? Elysia didnt understand. From all Elysia knew, there was nothing that could have made Pallatsera refuse.

Elysia had to say something. She raised her head, eyes puzzled. "Afraid of her past?" She shook her head, smiling softly though it was sad. Her voice was quiet. "I dont understand. She was always so happy, she wasn't traumatized." She tilted her head to Derek. "What else happened to her? After me and before you?" She rested her head again, enraptured in Derek's tale.

She wanted to rejoice in her sister's happiness, the love she and Derek had obviously shared. She wanted to see it and hear it and congratulate her sister. Why was she just too little too late? And her? An Alpha? Chosen above the beta female? Elysia felt pride soar inside of her. She closed her eyes for a moment before reopening them. There were so many questions she wanted to ask.

"Palla did have a past before myself and after you, she had been mated before and had pups before, only to lose them and herself in them. She was afraid to love again afraid of what that love would mean to her. But there is still more story to tell and if i do not tell it i will lose my courage." He closed his eyes once more.

"I began to feel that we need to be equal, here she was an alpha and i was still just a lowly guard it felt unbalanced. So when Rune the alpha male said there was a position open to be delta male i jumped at the opportunity. No surprise that i got the position, i was loved in the pack and had proven myself time and time again, and still happiness was to come...



"Months went by and her stomach grew as did my anxiety. The pups were wanted so badly, not just by myself but by the whole pack. the first pups of Banishing Winds Pack, and from an alpha no less. It was the happiest time of my life. So when the pups were born one the exact replica of my own dead sister and one that looked just like Palla and one a mix, there were no words to describe my pleasure. I couldn't wait to know more about my pups, what they would be like how they would grow, who they in turn would love." Derek's face grew dark as Palla's death grew near.

"She went down to the rivers edge to drink some water, our pups following behind playing. when the pups fell into the river, Palla went after them and before she could get them out ran into a boulder in the water knocking her unconscious and drowning her and the pups" Derek's face had contorted into one of pain hopelessness.

Faith looked at the male"I have heard some wolves say your name" she said. Her tail curled around herself as she sat down a few feet away from the male. "Is that alright of I call you that Zero-san" she said.

Faith let out a small smile as she looked up waiting for even the slightest noise from the male. She noticed another male or his friend had came by him. Maybe this was a sign to leave, to go away. She held her ground as she waited for him to say something, remembering she had never introduced herself. Something she wanted to say"Sorry but I should introduce myself...Faith...Faith is my name" she said her cranium pointed towards the male. Her paws dug into the ground, gasping the soil in her paws. Her white ears twitched waiting for the sound or response to come from the male known by Zero.

Falco gave a hopeless whimper hearing Silver's words "Please don't talk like that.. his voice pleaded and croaked as he nuzzled her again. Hewatched as she got to her paws, the wounds obviously healing, though deep gashes remained and scars set in. "You need to rest still Silver" he kept in the same tone as he watched her with his piercing green eyes.

{lame}